Sunday, January 20, 2019

Resolutions for a New Year - and a New Me

Making resolutions feels strange after experiencing deep loss. Any sort of planning or dreaming - is there any point when you know more of life's vicissitudes could be around the corner?

Saturday, January 5, 2019

Reflections After 2 Years

Happy new year, folks! I hope you've all started off well with crushing those resolutions. I know I have, because one of my big ones is to write more! More on my resolutions in another blog post that will follow in the next few days.

For now, I'm going to share some reflections on where I've been and where I'm at in the grief department. This post will be about looking back and the next post will be about looking forward.

Wednesday, July 4, 2018


Today, July 4th, 2018, would be Julia's 30th birthday. Though we still celebrate Julia, as we should, on this day, it's no longer her birthday. Or at least, it's no longer the day on which she transitions from one age to the next. She is now ageless.

Saturday, May 5, 2018

Discovering the New Me

Major life events change you.

I'm not sure if this is a controversial statement or not but I get the sense that many people don't want to believe it. Many people are uncomfortable with the idea that you can't always be 100% in control of your identity. Many people think that you can always choose who you are, what you believe, the communities you can exist in. I think I used to believe that - I can't remember exactly - but if I did, I don't anymore.

Wednesday, March 28, 2018

Suffering, Abandonment, and the Cross - My Interview at Cobourg Alliance Church

To be honest, I have a hard time being honest. At least with people I don't know well. It's not usually because I'm ashamed of anything or hate talking about my struggles. It's usually just because I don't have the energy to engage in the long conversations that go along with opening up.

Thursday, November 23, 2017

A Birthday Party in the Wasteland

November 5th was my 30th birthday. I suppose turning 30 is strange for most people, saying goodbye to your 20s. But moving into a new decade of life is not the strangest thing about turning 30 for me. There has been so much change in my life recently that turning 30 almost loses its novelty in comparison. Maybe the lack of novelty is what's novel about it. Going through each day without Julia is still so strange that every other potentially strange thing just gets swallowed up by this deeper strangeness.